June 2012
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May 2012
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colormemellow:
Family Fued has me yelling at my TV like these dumb asses can really hear me…no, wait, I, am a dumb ass, for yelling at these people like they can really hear me. they are dumb as a a bag of shits on this show though.
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The biggest problem I’m going to have with this wedding, I think, is the top of my bridesmaid’s dress. My sister prefers the sweetheart neckline, and if everybody else does, that’s what we’re going for. I, however, don’t like it because it highlights my boobs and that is the one area of my body which I’m incredibly uncomfortable about.
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I've found a subtle genius in that white-hot...
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homosaurus-rex:
It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.
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robbersmusic:
Belief in something that will outlive our bodies.
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“i can’t wait until you’re old and have a family which you force into...”
– Sara
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I think I'm clever and that's all that matters -...
I just told my brother’s fiancée to put two food processors on their wedding registry and give the extra to me.
With the exception of my brother and his best man, I am the tallest person in the wedding party.
We were discussing how she would need a sob-story to get onto Say Yes To The Dress.
So I was like, “Problem solved! I use a wheel chair”.
We all laughed so hard we...
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“We let Willow cut her hair. When you have a little girl, it’s like how can you...”
– Will Smith in Parade Magazine on Willow’s hair (via fuckyeahfeminists)
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